"Flash Forward" Is Coming "2 Fast, 2 Furious"!!!!! 90's???

First of all let me say "It's official boys I'm back!!!" ala Might Ducks, its been way too long, but as most people do over the summer they enjoy the nice weather, and that is the excuse that I am using. Also let me say if you aren't already, please follow @collegepanda and @mattshaef on Twitter, and soon to be we will have a UBP website name you can follow, we will keep you posted.

Enough with BS the Panda is back and can smell blood in the water, lets get to business. I am soo sooo soooooo amped because fast approaching is September 24 @ 8/7c will be ABC's next Lost... Yes Laef I said it. This show is going to be so profound and so beautiful and intriguing that you will literally be on the edge of your seat throughout the whole episode week in and week out. This is exactly the type of show ABC was hoping for as Lost sadly will be ending their brilliant and legendary run next year.  

For those of you not familiar with Flash Forward, it begins with a global event that causes everyone in the world to black out for exactly 2 minutes and 17 seconds. Along with this while they are passed out they have seen what will happen to them 6 months into the future. When they come to they are left wondering if what they saw in their future will actually come true. The trailer is so brilliant and so gorgeous and sexy that I had to pause it half way through to get a napkin to wipe the tears from my eyes. Again it starts February 24th at 8/7c on the greatest channel on TV ABC, followed closely by FX. Here is that brilliant Flash Forward Trailer is was talking about:

Flash Forward - Trailer Officiel (Can You Change Fate ?)
by SeriesNet

P.S. Here is the 2 Fast, 2 Furious Trailer as well, Just because you all missed the Panda:

2 Fast 2 Furious Trailer
by kuamovie

I Love You Always, And Never,
Heres a pic of me and my friends enjoying the nice summer weather on my boat:

College Panda

Hey Oscar how was your gay-cation

So we have not been active on this blog for a while, but I was sitting there today thinking that I missed doing it and figured we should get back on this (College Panda does not know this is happening, but he will soon enough).

Another inspiration I had was the movie The Insider, which I watched last night and enjoyed the hell out of it. It was part of my ongoing mission to watch all the movies I am embarrassed, as a self proclaimed movie guru, to not have seen. If you haven;t seen it I recommend it, although it is well over 2 hours long and all I ever hear are people complaining about the length of movies (which pisses me off most of the time, especially when they complain about the length of movies as great as The Dark Knight)

Anyways, we are back and I will be seeing District 9 this weekend which will allow me to make my list for best movies of the summer (a disappointing summer). I am not sure if College Panda will get on here again before that, but you can almost bet he will be back with his nonsensical ramblings (you ready for this Panda?). We also may have a new writer on here, someone who goes by the name of Gil and may have some brilliant input. We also might be adding a little bit more sport talk this second time around, so stay tuned.

LAEF

X-Men Origins: Woooooooooooooooolverine

As you can tell from the title I'm pretty damn excited for the opening of this movie. Probably even more excited than College Panda was when he found out that Iowa passed gay marriage and even more excited than Derek Fisher was when he found out he has a fan (Note: She might be a little crazy, but let's be honest what woman's not).

But right now the reviews that are coming in for director Gavin Hood's first Hollywood movie are pretty bleak. Examples...

"A keen disappointment as action and effects take over from a poorly conceived story"-Kirk Honeycutt, Hollywood Reporter.

"While packed with effects and action, without the attention to story and emotional investment present in such films as The Dark Knight and Ironman, Wolverine ultimately doesn't rise above its comic-book roots."-Bill Goodykoontz, Arizona Republic.

There were plenty others better to choose from but I had to include the dude from Hollywood, and my new favorite critic good ol' Goodykoontz. Too many jokes and I'm sure they've all been done before.

What these guys don't get is that, for me at least, I'm not expecting the next Dark Knight, where I'm blown away by everything or even the next movie with a fantastic storyline where I'm hanging on every line and scene. Don't go into this expecting that either because you will be sorely disappointed. Be expecting a lively, sciency fiction, action packed, beat the bad guys ass movie.

Let me give you a few reasons of mine why I think I'm going to love this movie...

First, this movie is going to be awesome because of Hugh Jackman. And let me tell you by looking at the early pictures he is "Jack'd-man". Some roles were just made for one person and there is no one else in the world of actors that could play Wolverine better than Jackman.

Another reason this movie is going to be awesome is because of the supporting cast. Liev Schreiber, Ryan Reynolds, Taylor Kitsch, William(American Spelling), and Dominic Monaghan. Not the most star studded emsemble but just a group of solid actors that you know are not going to mail it in. I'm particularly interested in keeping an eye on Friday Night Lights Taylor Kitsch. It's going to be weird not seeing him with a beer in hand kissing on some grade A high school tail, but a solid performance here could spring his movie career.

Wolverine is also the kick-start for an awesome summer of film. Star Trek, Terminator, Angels and Demons, Transformers, etc, etc, etc.

Lastly, the final reason that I'm looking forward to Wolverine is that because it is going to be a manly, badass, action flick, that means that College Panda will not see it and waste more space on here talking about it. Sure Lynn Collins will be playing a love interest but for the sake of everyone reading lets hope her role is limited.

Friday can't come soon enough.

P.S. The next edition of the critically acclaimed V.U.S.S (Videos U Should See) will be Viewer V.U.S.S. So send in all your hilarious and off the wall videos to me and I will sift through them and post the best ones.

Over - Lindsay Lohan

Enough of Panda

What kind of name is "college panda?" If I was 15 years old I would actually think this was a pretty kick-ass name. But im not 15, "im 27, and you know what that makes me here? a fuckin senior citizen." That reminds me of a perfectly good example of how I know panda's gay - he doesn't know what movie that's from.
I'm just totally fed up with your ridiculous reviews on movies are completely irrelevant to anyone who has ever watched a motion picture . . . with sound. Let me tell you something, YOU don't know shit! Cool, I get it you enjoy chick flicks. I would enjoy these to if I hadn't had pussy since pussy had me.

And yes, 1st time on the site, I will be this vulgar.

So, Panda, look yourself in the mirror before you go to bed tonight and ask yourself, "Has it really been that long since I got pussy?" ERRRRR, should I say panda pussy?!




"HIII how are ya!?" I'm Nice guy Eddie

I'm Obsessed With Obsessed!!!!!!

Usually I don't like swimming around muddy waters for fear of shark attacks but today I find myself extremely fearless and ready to swim out there. Its the same way I felt about this movie Obsessed, after seeing a first trailer a while ago I was very skeptical and afraid but now after viewing this trailer I cant wait for this weekend. I'm sure you have all seen it but I just saw it and Obsessed hits theaters this Friday the 24th, come wait in the massive lines with me!!!!

I love how when you are afraid of things the only way to get over them is face them head on. That is exactly what I'm going to do with this movie, and that is exactly what I did by swimming in muddy waters with sharks, good thing sharks don't like Pandas!!!!

I love you, Always, and Never,

College Panda

Guess What Comes Out Tomorrow?!! Here's a Hint, WOOOOOOO!!!!!

Finally, finally, finally my long, harsh, cold wait has been over and the Christmas Smash hit The Spirit comes out on Blu Ray... People like Laef, who havent seen the movie, who base everything they see on sites like Filmschool, or Slashfilm will tell you that this film was awful. Let me tell you this, you will be pleasantly surprised by this movie as I sure I will be when I see it tomorrow. I will be the first to admit I didn't see it over Christmas but it was only because I was in hibernation until after January. So by then it had already left theaters. But every time I watch this trailer I know and see the true brilliance that is contained in this movie:

"I'm getting El Spirito Dead while I still can" WOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! How can you honestly listen to that line and not get pumped as hell to pop this in your blu ray player, or in Laef's case his VCR. "Somethings going down here it could be BIG, Laef BIG!!!!!" I'll be standing in line on Tuesday with the rest of you to get this jawn and will be taking in every second of it. 

I Love You, Always, And Never, 

College Panda

Year One

I just want Panda to know that I am not responding to his posts because I feel I need to defend myself against him. I am only doing this so the few people who read this thing are convinced there is at least one person who knows what he is talking about here. If you read Panda's last post you probably did not finish it because lets get real, do you really give a shit what a movie is rated? No, probably not. 

With that said it was not "rumored" that Year One had an R-rating, because it did. Then they re-cut the movie after they lost the appeal for the pg-13, and eventually received the pg-13 warning. Anyways, about me not liking Michael Cera....I love Michael Cera and think he is hilarious.  Oh and about Year One making $100 million, yeh that will not happen unless they do it opening weekend. The two weeks that follow Year One include the release of the second Transformers, Public Enemies and a third Ice Age movie. I would be shocked if they reached $60 million. Oh and Panda, I know you won;t go see Observe and Report this weekend because it is headed for a small weekend only hitting $4 million on Friday. In case you did not know Panda claimed it would make at least $30 and I said it was going to make shit. Again not like you care, but I just want you to know that there is actual knowledge coming from someone here. 

Como Esta Bitches,

Laef

Game, Set, Match, Laef!!!!!! WOOOO!!!!!

One of the summer's most anticipated films, Year One, has been rumored to get an R rating by the MPAA. But it seems today things have changed in their favor just as I thought. According to our friends at Slashfilm the movie has been re-cut and has now received the coveted PG-13 rating which will all but guarantee their 100 million dollar summer. Laef was giving me shit about this movie yesterday because I told him how pumped I was for this movie to come out, and of course because its not an indie flick he's not buying into it. Also because he has some problem with Michael Cera, which I don't see how you have a problem with him he is actually brilliant. Really all of this hatred Laef has towards this movie really stems all the way back to when the OC got cancelled, and now it seems everything I get excited about he shoots down because Tree Hill is still on the air and its killing him.

Let me apologize Year One, it's not your fault, it's Laef's bitterness that is ruining your coming out party and let me tell you I will be there "Hat in Hand" (is that right Ole Painless?) in the I'm sure will be sold out theater on DAY ONE watching to see it. Just face it Laef, I win, and I will always win when I have Tree Hill on my side. It's like what Chris Pine said in the greatest trailer on earth for the best movie of the summer, Star Trek, "Why are you talking to me man?" WOOOOOOO!!!! So Laef answer me this, why are you talking to me man? Tree Hill wins, and so does Year One!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I Love You, Always, and Never,

College Panda