Thank Fucking God!!! Please Tell Me This Is True!!!

According to our pals over at Filmschoolrejects.com (Who Laef by the way jerks it to once a day) I have read today that Samuel L. Jackson may not be playing the role of Nick Fury in the upcoming Avengers movie... Wow I literally got a huge Bonner when i heard this, and by huge i mean like 3 inches, girls tell me its cute so I'm OK with it...Is it just me or is anybody else sick of seeing this fucking dude in movies... i mean i cant think of a movie recently that he has been in that he was any good??? I mean please correct me if I was wrong, but other than Pulp Fiction, what else worth mentioning has he done... The first thing I'm going to do when i move out to Hollywood and become a famous actor is find his agent and make him mine... Bomb after bomb this dude does and keeps getting roles, its seems like every year hes doing 4 to 5 movies!! Maybe its just me, but I'm seeing him in everything now, sometimes not even big roles just minor stupid roles... i mean i was watching HBO last night and watched Jumper, what a fucking horrible character he played, to make it worse they gave him one cheesy line after the other... Then as I awoke from the movie because he literally put me to sleep i decided id beat off before i went to bed...After about an hour of scrolling and creeping through my various sites i stumble upon a nice vid that i think will do the trick, little did i know mid-beat this dude turns towards the camera as hes banging this chick from behind and its none other than fucking Samuel "Sure Thing" Jackson, and sure enough the title of the porn was This Guy is a "Sure Thing"...

   Marvel Comics, do yourselves a favor and don't ruin this brilliant brilliant franchise that you have built by casting this talentless wannabe thug corny one-line muthafucka as Nick Fury in what could be one of the greatest movies of all time!!! Hey Sam, did i say that right "Muthafucka"??  I'm sorry I'm not fluent in gangsta... Also i have a perfect replacement for Nick Fury anyways, a guy who will more than fill the shoes and bring a whole new side to Nick Fury, a man by the name of Matthew Mcconaughey!!! No need to pay me for the tip just pay it forward by casting him and giving the fans of this franchise what they want and need, Jackson out Mcconaughey in!!! 

            "We have to go back Laef!!!! We have to go back!!!!!!!"

---And Who Am I??? That's one secret ill never tell....You know you love me...XOXO

                        College Panda